Dear Crabby, Have You Heard of ‘No Ring, No Bring?’

Dear Crabby,

I have been dating a great guy and we’re finally at that stage where we’re meeting each other’s families. My cousin is getting married later this month, and I assumed that would be the perfect opportunity for him to meet my family. That is until I found out my cousin (the bride) has instituted a ‘No ring, no bring’ policy. So, since I don’t have a ring on my finger, I can’t bring him as my date. Do you think that’s fair?

Thanks!
Mary Belle

Dear Mary Belle,

Well, I think your cousin is probably looking at it from a cost perspective. I spent some time on the Google and learned that the average wedding in the United States costs a little over $35,000!! You know what you could get for that kind of money? A Model 3 Tesla or four tickets on the 50-yard line at the Super Bowl… heck you can even buy one of those tiny houses! Now, I don’t know how much your cousin is spending for her wedding, but my point is these shindigs ain’t cheap. Especially for the bride’s family. My bank account and my sanity barely survived when my daughter got married. I offered her $15,000 and a ladder, but she insisted on going the whole nine yards. And I understand your eagerness to introduce your sweetheart, but a wedding is kind of a high-pressure environment to do it in. What about a family reunion? That might be a better scenario. They are usually low-key and a lot of relatives show up. Your guy can even challenge the old coots to a game of horseshoes. Plus, I’ve always found the potluck style of food at family reunions to be far superior to anything I’ve eaten at a fancy-pants wedding. I remember the first time I met Mrs. Crabby’s family. Boy was I nervous! Her family was having a backyard BBQ and she brought me. At first, I thought I was just going to meet her parents and siblings. But the longer I was there, the more family members seemed to ‘drop by’ or ‘be in the neighborhood.’ By the time the night was over, I think I’d met every last person in her family! Now, had I gone to the BBQ knowing all those folks would be there, I would have probably either found someplace to hide or made an excuse to leave the first chance I could. So, instead of being upset your cousin won’t let you bring a date, look at it from her point of view. This is her day to shine. As for your boyfriend, if he’s the right guy for you, there will be another chance for you to show him off.

Now go have fun at the wedding and eat an extra piece of cake for me!
Dear Crabby

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About Dear Crabby

Stuck in a rut? Need some biased advice from a crabby old baby-boomer? Read regularly by thousands and loved by some, Dear Crabby answers questions weekly to life's challenges. Send him a note at DearCrabby@rochestermedia.com.

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